Empty Nest Moms

Our "Senior" Empty Nesters! => Grandchildren! => Topic started by: horizon on June 02, 2018, 12:29:17 AM

Title: Avoiding favoritism
Post by: horizon on June 02, 2018, 12:29:17 AM
I don't want to play favorites because I think it's important to build the children's concept of self-appreciation as early as possible. Unfortunately, it's hard to fight my preferences. I like someone affectionate. I like someone with good humor. I like someone with blue eyes.

To be honest, I feel guilty at times.

What do you suggest?
Title: Re: Avoiding favoritism
Post by: Kidless on June 03, 2018, 07:14:24 AM
Children have their own personalities and it may not be one we like.  However, that is your child and you must work hard to be as fair and equal as possible.  You may not like what they do but you will always love them. 
Title: Re: Avoiding favoritism
Post by: haidyl on June 03, 2018, 02:20:05 PM
You can love them equally without showing that you have preferences. Remember that they may not notice it at first but when they do, it could affect them. I feel that every child is different and unique and it is upon us to bring the best out of them.
Title: Re: Avoiding favoritism
Post by: horizon on June 04, 2018, 12:16:34 AM
I'm talking about my grandchildren. I leave most of their education to their parents, though I help here or there occasionally. Sometimes I worry that my favoritism would get in the way of their parents' plan.

How do you stay equal to everyone? For example, if only one of them makes a mistake, do you just scold all of them?
Title: Re: Avoiding favoritism
Post by: haidyl on June 04, 2018, 12:04:26 PM
When we used to make mistakes as young kids, our parents used to correct us all. I think this is important because it will create a sort of responsibility for each other. How often do your grandchildren visit? It would create a problem if one of them noticed that they were the 'favorite' so-to-speak. Again, I think it also depends on how the parents treat them.