Empty Nest Moms
Empty Nest Moms AND Dads! => Our Empty Nest => Topic started by: Sandy on April 22, 2019, 01:30:38 PM
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My daughter is moving and I feel so sad but yet so proud of her.
I don’t know how to explain the weird roller coaster ride of emotions im going through right now.
My daughter decided to move out of state only 2 1/2 hours away but as a single mom i never envisioned my children moving away. Although she went away to college and moved home after this feels some how different and final.
My son is still at home but my daughter and i hung out together and watched tv and now i cant help but feel like thats never going to be the same again.
I am trying not to let her see how sad i am because i realize this is what shes supposed to be doing.Ive tried to read up on empty nest but mine is not completely empty however i feel like the three musketeers are ending.my entire life has consisted of working and raising my children on my own after a divorce. I dont know what my purpose is going to be anymore. I don’t have a significant other to take up my free time so im feeling sort of lost. Any advice on what i need to do to make myself better because im so tired of feeling sad?
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Sandy, welcome to the family! :big hug smiley sign:
I totally understand your range of emotions. I cringe to think of mine leaving the state, but 2 hours is do-able. You can get to her and she can get to you quickly. Maybe come home for the weekends or something.
Hang in there! You have raised her right to be independent, and this is one of the ways of her spreading her wings.
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Hello Sandy, welcome to this great platform and I am sure you will feel at home sharing and reading about other people's experiences. It is normal to have a rollercoaster of emotions because your daughter moving out is a big deal.
Just like MaryB says, two and a half hours seems manageable and apart from striving to see each other over the weekend, you can maintain constant communication. Deep down, I know that you are proud of the person your daughter has turned out to be!
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Welcome Sandy and hang in there. You will adjust soon to her move and start figuring out how you can see each other from time to time. It does take a while but as the others said, 2 1/2 hours away is doable. Keep us posted on how you are doing and we're always here for you to 'talk' to. :039:
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Welcome to the forum Sandy! I know it's said all the time but 'give yourself time'! It's not only the kids that go through a new phase but us parents too! As she gets settled I'm sure you will come up with some sort of way to spend time with each other. Two and a half hours, as the others said, is doable. Meanwhile just try to keep yourself busy. You're not alone in this many others here have or are going through some of the same emotions! Feel free to read a lot of the other post and come here to chat any time you feel like it.
:grouphugsign: :grouphugsign:
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Wow thank you all so much i didnt think i would get any response from this. I know my daughter will do great on her own i just will really miss her and i know my son will as well we are the three musketeers and i certainly will feel the emptiness without her.
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Hi Sandy, thanks for checking back in. :039: Yep, you will usually get replies back from other members, maybe not always right away as some just pop in every now and then while others more often, just need to be patient. You'll always most often find someone here that is going through the same as you which is nice to know that you aren't the only one going through this.
Things do change when the kids start to leave home but with time and patience you can develop a new 'adult' relationship with your 'kids' (as they will always be your children no matter how old). :)
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Hi Sandy, welcome! Yeah you do have to adjust to these changes as the kids start to leave home. How old is your son? Hopefully she will get back to visit you and your son as often as possible so maybe the adjustment won't be so hard.
Let us know how it goes!
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My son is 21 so hopefully he'll stick around for a bit. I am starting to realize i'm dreading watching her leave this weekend.
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Well my daughter left today and my heart aches. I feel like someone ripped a part of me off. I am extremely proud one minute and sad and lonely the next..
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Sandy I am so sorry dear.. my heart goes out to you. I can feel the tears rolling down your cheeks without even crying. Your heart is crying. You will keep in touch and you will be ok when you see you are not losing her, really! But tonight you can feel sad.. you let yourself feel sad. :big hug smiley sign:
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Hang in there Sandy..... :grouphugsign: It'll be tough for a while but as mentioned before, I'm sure you'll both work out some sort of routine to stay in contact with each other. It's been a couple days since you posted, is she starting to get a little bit settled yet?
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It'll work out in the long run Sandy. Been there done that! When our first one left for college I thought I'd never be the same. I missed her being around all the time so much. But, with time (and you do get so tired of hearing that work...'time'!) it really does get better. It's not the same of course but you start to develop a whole new relationship.
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Hi Sandy, just checking up on post and this one caught my eye. How are you doing today? Has your daughter gotten settled yet? I hope you are feeling better today and please hang in there, things will smooth out for you eventually, just doesn't seem like it right now, I know but deep breath and have patience.
:big hug smiley sign: :big hug smiley sign:
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Hi Sandy,
I'm sorry you're having such a rough time right now. This is a big change, and it'll take a while to get used to the new "normal."
It's important to feel your feelings so that you can work through them. But you can definitely use distractions when they become overwhelming. Try some volunteer work or maybe tackle some household projects you've been meaning to do? We are all always here to listen to and support you when you need us, too.
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Hi Sandy, it's been almost 2 months since we last heard from you and was wondering how you are doing? Have you been able to stay in touch with your daughter much? Are you starting to adjust somewhat to her being gone?
Hope you see this post and can update us on how you are doing.....Take care now :tinypinkflowers:
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Hi, I so know how you feel. My daughter moved to Spain in 2013. Before I moved to Florida in 2017, she'd come back, "home" during the summer. Last summer, she got married to her Spanish boyfriend and currently they live in France. I haven't had a holiday with her since 2012. We try to have Christmas in July but it's not the same. Her husband has not missed one holiday with his family. They always spend Christmas at his family's house in Spain. In 2017 I sold the my family house in RI and moved on my own to Florida. I've done a lot and been through a lot but it's not the same as back home in RI. My daughter and her husband are coming to Florida next week for a visit. He's staying about 11 days but she will be staying a bit longer before she heads up to RI to visit some people. This trip has been months in planning and I'm so looking forward to seeing my daughter but know how hard it will be to see her leave, knowing that I won't see her for another year. Have to say, enjoy that your daughter isn't more than a car drive away. My son lives part of the year in RI and the other part in Tn, in a shell of a house that his dad purchased during our divorce. I'd love to have my kids live closer. My son does chat with me more often than my daughter, at least he and I are in the same time zone but my daughter and I are 6 hours apart. Doesn't really help during the school year when we are both teaching. It's al ot of change that we go through as well as our kids, when they move on with their lives. I'm still trying to work through empty nesting, definitely is a roller coaster!