Move? Stay? Suddenly confused!

[Moonchild]

Hi all!


I'm new here and SO happy to have a forum to share and talk to others in the same boat.


My youngest goes off to college in August and my oldest (20) is finally moving out on his own.  6 months ago I decided I would need to sell the house since I wouldn't be able to afford it without all the child support I was getting, not to mention my business doesn't give me a lot of income either.  My oldest and I also had some issues which had me feeling the only way I could get him out of my house was to move! lol


Fast forward to now, and I'm scared as all get out.  The only real money I have is the equity in my house.  Without child support I don't qualify for any type of mortgage.  The price range I'm in means I need to find a fixer upper or move more into the country to afford anything.  Apartments and condos aren't for me.  I'm looking for some relaxing space with a nice wooded yard and peace and quiet. 


I'm getting scared to lose my house I've lived in for 15 years.  It's comfortable, big enough and now it's super updated since I've been painting and putting in new flooring etc to sell it.  Financially, I'd need to get a job if I wanted to refinance and keep it.  I own a retail store.  I can't just close that down, I love it. 


I can't help but think the space I need will come with my son moving out and my daughter off to school and maybe I don't really need to move. 


I'm really confused!  The market is so hot right now and my house is in a really desirable area for families with kids I'm sure this house would sell in record time and at a nice profit for me.  I'm pushing forward with the cleaning and painting, but not sure what to do.


Thanks for reading...feel a bit better getting all that out

[Jeanine]

   Moonchild! Sounds like you have some 'thinking' to do. What kind of retail store do you have? Is there anything you could do to make it more profitable for you to stay in your home? Maybe get a part time job if need be. Sounds like you would really like to stay where you are.


But.....then on the other hand, if you sell and make a nice profit to find something smaller that would make  you happy and have enough money in the bank to carry you through.......LoL, not sure if I helped or not but I'm sure you will think it through and come up with what is best in the long run.....good luck and do keep us posted.


Look forward to seeing more of you around here. 

[MaryB]

  Welcome Moonchild!!!  I'm so glad you joined us!   


My two cents is that if you only were thinking of moving to get the eldest to move on,  well then you didnt really want to move?  I know one thing for sure,  dont do anything until you are sure.
Talking does help so talk away.   

[Moonchild]

Thanks for the replies!


Yes, I really do believe getting my son out was my drastic move in selling to push him towards the door.  His stepmother refused to let him live there awhile back when I had enough - even though his father had told me it was okay.  Not sure how anything has changed since then, but he needs to go. 


I feel like all I've done is think!  Since I have to wait for my house to close before I have money to buy a house - that may also put me in limbo until I find one.  I don't want to just settle for anything that comes my way.


I believe in going with the flow and letting life lead you to where you're supposed to go...but, this is some tough faith right here! 


Did I mention how much I love my house since I made it all nice and pretty?  I know I did, but I feel it needs repeating. lol

[Elizabeth]

Hi Moonchild, welcome! I think you just made your decision....just go with the flow and see what happens! Could be an interesting ride. Will you end up selling or staying??? Only your destiny knows! 

[CountryMom]

Welcome to the forum! It's a really great place when you need a friendly ear. I just sold my house and I'm moving this Friday. It can be really difficult to leave behind the home you've known and loved for so long. You can make your new home nice and pretty too, though!


Is there any way you could make extra income on the side if you decided you really couldn't part with your home? There are lots of opportunities online these days.

[Katy]

This is a huge decision that deserves a lot of consideration. Have you talked with a financial adviser? Maybe he/she could help you figure this out as far as finances go. It kind of sounds like you'd like to stay in your home, so maybe a financial adviser could help you determine if that's possible with your current income. I really hope it all works out for you!

[nvgt16]

Just wondering if you had a time limit to make a decision, else spending time thinking about your options sounds like a good start. I moved from RI to Florida 1 1/2 years ago, kind of a quick decision that I had to make because I wasn't making enough money to pay for everything and have money left over for retirement. I had lived in my home for 30 years, lots of memories but with both of my kids out of the house and being single again, it was an empty house. I have finally started to feel like my house is becoming more of a home because my daughter and her husband have been/are at my house helping me clean it out and make it mine. My daughter leaves Friday. I'm sure what ever decision you make, you will do well!