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Author Topic: Loss of control or loss of purpose?  (Read 138 times)

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Offline MaryB

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Loss of control or loss of purpose?
« on: March 02, 2019, 02:36:41 PM »
Two of the things we experience in empty nest are loss of control over what our children are doing, mainly thinking of protecting them,  and loss of purpose for our own lives.  Do you agree?  Have you experienced these like I have?

Empty Nest Moms

Loss of control or loss of purpose?
« on: March 02, 2019, 02:36:41 PM »

Offline mkendrick

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Re: Loss of control or loss of purpose?
« Reply #1 on: March 05, 2019, 03:47:34 AM »
I completely understand what you mean. We spent so many years protecting and directing the kids it is very strange to not have to fill that role for them anymore. I guess that's the best advice I can give you. As long as you feel like you don't HAVE to protect them you should be happy that they are protecting themselves. Every situation is different though and I don't mean to say that they don't need us. In fact I think in some ways my kids need me now more than ever, but they just don't need my protection anymore.

Offline MaryB

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Re: Loss of control or loss of purpose?
« Reply #2 on: March 05, 2019, 03:09:58 PM »
Oh mkendrick.... :(   but I still want to protect my child..    haha  I know you are exactly right and we cant..  there's no cut off to make it easy for us to let go is there...  just something we HAVE to do!   :039:

Empty Nest Moms

Re: Loss of control or loss of purpose?
« Reply #2 on: March 05, 2019, 03:09:58 PM »

Offline Layla

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Re: Loss of control or loss of purpose?
« Reply #3 on: March 07, 2019, 07:17:17 AM »
I can definitely relate to this! I find myself having a lot of anxiety because I don't know where my daughter is or what she's doing at any given time. I worry that she's in trouble or that she's unwell, and I'm not there to protect and take care of her.

Offline vivie

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Re: Loss of control or loss of purpose?
« Reply #4 on: March 08, 2019, 01:23:38 PM »
It is perfectly natural for any parent to worry about the loss of control over what their children do but we should always be careful not to lose our own purpose. At some point, the kids have to live independently and at times, seeking to control most of they do could push them away. Overall, what matters is the kind of relationship we enjoy with them.

Empty Nest Moms

Re: Loss of control or loss of purpose?
« Reply #4 on: March 08, 2019, 01:23:38 PM »

 

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