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Author Topic: My parents really complemented each other  (Read 2752 times)

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Offline girlchild34

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My parents really complemented each other
« on: December 10, 2018, 04:00:29 AM »
Growing up was fun and there are a lot of childhood memories that I can never forget. My dad loved to take photographs and I recall a particular camera that he had for many years. My mother loved to cook for us especially during the holidays. I really miss being under their watchful eye but a lot of what I saw them to do is exactly what I did when my time to raise a family came.

Offline MaryB

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Re: My parents really complemented each other
« Reply #1 on: December 10, 2018, 06:38:50 PM »
This time of  year I really miss my parents.  Dad was Mr Christmas.  He loved Christmas and had a Lionel train collection out of this world.  He'd put the trains down, taking up all of the living room,  put up lights and a tree..  Mom would bake and made candies..  We never had many presents, if only one even, but the whole spirit of Christmas was there and they were all good memories. 

Offline girlchild34

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Re: My parents really complemented each other
« Reply #2 on: December 15, 2018, 02:36:23 PM »
Indeed Christmas had a whole different meaning MaryB and back then it wasn't much about the presents but more about making merry. I could listen to Jim Reeve's Christmas carols and never get tired of them.

Offline Indiana

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Re: My parents really complemented each other
« Reply #3 on: January 28, 2019, 10:59:23 AM »
Isn't it funny how we become our parents? There are certain things I do that my mom always did that I swore I never would. Same with dad, although I take more from him than mom.


I don't know if that's good or bad. LOL  :coffee2:

Offline Indiana

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Re: My parents really complemented each other
« Reply #4 on: January 28, 2019, 11:00:56 AM »
.......a lot of what I saw them to do is exactly what I did when my time to raise a family came. 

Isn't it funny how we become our parents? There are certain things I do that my mom always did that I swore I never would. Same with dad, although I take more from him than mom.


I don't know if that's good or bad. LOL  :coffee2:


Offline mkendrick

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Re: My parents really complemented each other
« Reply #5 on: February 08, 2019, 06:01:10 PM »
I completely agree with you.  If you had told me as a young man that I would be very much like my father as I got older I may have been upset with you!  :)  I think my son might feel the same way now.  It's funny how much of myself I see in him when I was his age.  It makes me think that the cycle we are on will never end and that brings a little comfort to me when we're butting heads.  One day he will have a son of his own and see his cycle's end meet back at the beginning just as I did with him.  I miss my father very much but if I hold his memory in my heart a piece of him is still alive.

Offline MaryB

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Re: My parents really complemented each other
« Reply #6 on: February 08, 2019, 07:35:58 PM »
But but but but  this upsets me because my son was estranged for years, and when he came back he came back acting just like his dad, which is NOT good!  I could not get over how he could leave and be one way and then BOOM act like his dad, with all the bad habits and all!  This is scary to me! :dunno:

Offline mkendrick

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Re: My parents really complemented each other
« Reply #7 on: February 08, 2019, 10:30:39 PM »
MaryB, would you care to share what happened to cause you and your son to not speak for years? Have you been able to have a discussion with him regarding that time? I ask because there was a period of about 2 years where my son and his wife didn't speak with me.  It was hard, but I figured that when he was ready he would reach out to me.  I would always make sure to send messages that were intentionally very neutral during holidays and for his birthday, but I wanted to give him the space his actions were begging for.  When he did finally reach out, we didn't talk about that period of time at all for at least a year.  I had mulled over it in my head many times and had made my own conclusion about what I thought had caused it.  One night it came up over dinner and my son tried to change the topic more than once.  At one point he even said something like, "No need to bring up the past, let's not talk about this." I responded saying that I disagreed and if we didn't discuss what happened we might miss the chance to learn and forgive each other.  It was a long talk but we really got to the root of the problems even though it was years later.  Neither of us were quite right about things that instigated the "falling out" period. We really connected and had a chance to walk in each other's shoes so to speak. If you haven't had a chance to discuss that with your son I would start there and see where it goes. You might not get the same reaction, but whatever happens you might have more insight into what is happening now.

Offline MaryB

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Re: My parents really complemented each other
« Reply #8 on: February 09, 2019, 09:02:55 AM »
Oh mkendrick, thank you so much for opening up and sharing your experience.  I am so glad that worked out for you and you and your son are together again.
My son and I were very close and no one could have told me a girl could turn his head but one came along that wanted him and not his family (none of his past at all, friends or family), and to be with her he did it, turned his back and locked us all out. One of the first things the girl did was buy him a new cell phone with a new number so we could not get to him.  When they want to block you out they can, believe me on that.  So fast forward and he leaves her, divorces her.  He came back to us saying he never loved her 'like that' but wanted sex back then and would do anything for it (her mom let them sleep together and I wouldnt).  So he moved in with them and shut us out.  That's a very long story short..  but anyway he has changed.  He left a wonderful young man that people thought would be a preacher.  He came back cussing, drinking and not wanting anything to do with church or God..  I told him the other nite it's like he was off to war and came back so changed, that I will never understand.  But as far as having that talk, nothing makes me feel comfortable with him.  He is like a new person with a HUGE chip on his shoulder and his dad is a dry drunk that is no good as a father to instruct or guide or set a good example.  In fact he promotes and encourages the path my son is on.  I had no knowledge of estrangement before it happened to me, but since learned that when they do it, it makes it easier for them to do it again.  Since my son shows no real sorrow for how he hurt me I really suspect he would or could do it again.  I wish I could turn my heart off but he is my only child, my miracle baby...  I just love him so much..  it's kinda like loving a porcupine,  cant get to close. 
Thank you. 

Offline CountryMom

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Re: My parents really complemented each other
« Reply #9 on: February 23, 2019, 12:25:21 AM »
My goodness, I'm sorry to hear about your experience, Mary. That sounds just awful. That woman sounds like an abuser and I'm happy your son had enough sense to leave her. I wish you and your family peace and healing.

Offline MaryB

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Re: My parents really complemented each other
« Reply #10 on: February 23, 2019, 09:55:35 AM »
Thank you CountryMom  :cute group hug:   I wish my son would take therapy but he does not see anything is wrong.   I keep praying he will meet a good woman.  He would listen to another woman maybe. 

 

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