What do you always look forward to?

[girlchild34]

In reality, what worries most parents is the anticipation of the drastic changes that the empty nest could bring, rather than the reality of living as an empty nester. Away from the fact that we now have more time on our own to allow us focus on our relationship, my husband and I always look forward to the kids coming back to visit.

The house suddenly transitions from a quiet abode to a really noisy one!

[cherie]

The return of the kids is a great thing for all of us but what always worries me is having to 'start' over, once they have left. Getting to hear their experiences or challenges while living on their own gives the chance to offer solutions. We always look forward to hearing them share stories of their progress, in every other sphere of their lives.

[Guineagirl]

The return of the kids is a great thing for all of us but what always worries me is having to 'start' over, once they have left. Getting to hear their experiences or challenges while living on their own gives the chance to offer solutions. We always look forward to hearing them share stories of their progress, in every other sphere of their lives.

You took the words right out of my mouth Cherie, I second everything you have said.  Waving bye is the most upsetting thing and brings back all the feelings from the very first goodbye.  It’s then looking forward to the next visit.


I look forward to texts every day.  I’m lucky my daughter texts me everyday lots of times and calls x

[FeelingBetter]

Yes, there is a positive side to this new tech stuff now a days. It does keep us in contact with the kids. I love getting pictures of some of their adventures that they have. Also just a text here and there to say hi. They do come to visit us as often as they can and like you mentioned Guineagirl, waving bye is kind of hard sometimes. You get that little 'feeling' in the pit of your stomach as to just how much time has gone by and how much older they are getting.

[noodle]

You get that little 'feeling' in the pit of your stomach as to just how much time has gone by and how much older they are getting.

I feel that pit even after their phone calls! My husband and I were talking today about how much we still miss their random actions, little things like walking up to you and asking, "What's for dinner?"

[Layla]

I agree, I look forward to my daughter's visits on her breaks from college. I, too, hate it when she leaves because it's so difficult. It brings back all the lonely feelings I have. I am sure it gets easier over time, but right now, it still hurts quite a bit as my daughter is only a freshman in college.

[Guineagirl]

It makes me look back also at the first goodbye.  I remember our daughter stood on her step in her house share waving us off.  I cried the whole three hour journey home, we were both in silence the whole way, I staring out of the window into the darkness as it was winter.  Does anyone else wonder looking back how did we get through that time?

[Quiet Abode]

Sometimes i feel guilty for holding my kids back.  My parents encouraged me to stick close and I pushed my kids to do the same.  I never demanded it just as my parents never demanded it of me, but it was definitely expected.  My daughter graduated college and got a job close by and married a local man.  My son is in college several hours away, but he's close enough to visit during breaks and I could help him in an emergency.  I don't know, Guineagirl.  You sound incredibly brave to me.  You knew your daughter needed to live her life and it sounds like you've done a fantastic job. If it were up to me, I'd have my crew living in a family compound with separate houses so they could have their freedom, but all in the same cuddle-sac. 

[girlchild34]

These feelings can only be experienced first-hand. Just the other day, we invited a young couple for dinner and seeing their kids run around the house and up and down the stair case brought back memories of our three chidren. We spent the better part of the evening insisting on the need to create a lasting bond because time moves fast and they will soon be out of the home.

The sweet memories are some of the things that empty nesters hold on to, as they try to transition. Can you imagine how hard this can become if that special bond never existed?