Help

[Sophie]

2 kids finished college and moved out in significant realagiinships (1engaged) and 1 away at college.  They were my world. Have a husband but really only stayed for the kids to have a stable consistent environment and now I'm sitting here like...what now? I feel like my life is at its end and am perseverating on how little time I have left and how my life is over. I'm 51 lol I realize the stupidity of my thoughts and I am by no means suicidal but am afraid to die and be totally alone. Am I going crazy or are these normal thoughts to be having at this point in my life?

[girlchild34]

I can really relate to that feeling Sophie and all I can urge you is to hang in there because you surely deserve the best in this life. Is there someone close that you can open up to? Have you tried to share your thoughts with your husband?

[Elizabeth]

Oh sweetie, you aren't alone in this! Lots of us have felt similar feelings. You just need to take a deep breath and start figuring out where you want to go from here. I know it will be hard at first but just try to think of things you used to do or wanted to but didn't have time because of the kids.


Give yourself time and try to get busy to keep your mind on other things. It will get better but you may need to work on it a bit. As  girlchild mentioned, maybe try to find someone you can talk to? Good friend, minister if you go to church, etc.


I would keep coming here to also and read a lot of the post, you will find you aren't really going crazy, there are others out there with the same feelings!


 

[FeelingBetter]

Oh Sophie, you are certainly not going crazy as a lot of us have thought also in the beginning. You are still young and have a lot to look forward to with your kids.....Marriage? Grandkids?


Having adult relationships with them can be very rewarding. I know things change but they can change for the good if you work on it and give it all time. Get busy! I know it's not always what you want to hear but it can help.


Feel free to come and talk to us anytime!

[CountryMom]

Do you think you'll be having any grandchildren soon? They really are a huge delight! Completely adorable and when they get too rowdy you send them back to Mom and Dad I've been using this "alone" time to really get to know myself, the self I neglected over the many years of being a wife and mother.

[Layla]

Depression is a very natural response to your kids leaving. I'm struggling a lot myself, wondering what to do with my life now that my daughter has gone off to college. It's a very challenging time in a parent's life!

Do you have some hobbies you can focus on or friends you can get together with and chat? I find keeping busy tends to keep me from thinking negative thoughts.

Please hang in there and talk to us anytime you need to. We can all relate here and are here to support you.

[cherie]

We all feel some type of way when the kids leave and much as these feelings can sometimes spiral out of control, getting someone close to share our issues with, can really help. Just as CountryMom says, grandchildren do help to keep such thoughts away but until their time comes, it would be great for you to find a way of remaining optimistic and using this 'alone' time to better yourself.

[Indiana]

No one wants to spend their end days alone. Your concern is quite normal. But you are only 51. You have plenty of time. Take it slow, watch your health and stay positive.