Was 'empty nest' everything you had planned?

[ava]

We started getting used to the fact that the kids would leave at some point, but when the reality set in, everything did not necessarily fall into place. We had no idea that there would be so much time left, once the kids were on their own. Plans had to be reorganized and as much as we took trips, invited friends and even organized to have the kids around or visited them, much of this free time was spent just between us.

How did it go for you? Were you shell-shocked at first?

[Marie]

I can relate.  I didn't realize just how busy my kids kept us until they left home.  I have a lot more time to read, do some home improvement projects with my husband, and actually have some free time on weekends to go to the flea market or festivals now, but I still find myself with a lot of spare time on my hands.  It's amazing how busy our children kept us.  My spouse and I are having to rediscover who we are both as individuals and as a couple, and it isn't always the smoothest road.

[Indiana]

I wasn't shell-shocked because I saw it coming AND accepted it. Not saying that others do yet don't, but I didn't want to get all worked up over it.

[ava]

True Marie, rediscovering each other isn't always the easiest thing to do but I bet you will emerge as better people, once you are through with this process. Having a lot of time that you didn't have before could easily distract anyone and I agree with Indiana that accepting this and ultimately moving on, changes everything.

[4am coffee]

It wasn't what we envsioned, that's for sure. "Planned" isn't quite the right word I would use, but there were adjustments to be made between what we thought it would be like and how it actually was.