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Author Topic: Have you ever felt disconnected from your kids?  (Read 1586 times)

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Offline Augi

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Have you ever felt disconnected from your kids?
« on: June 01, 2018, 09:39:02 AM »
I suppose we all feel this way from time to time because our kids are their own selves, but is it worse now that the kids are out of the home? I've heard some people say that they get along better with their kids now that their kids are away because distance has created more fondness and more appreciation of family. On the other hand, there are some people who feel like they don't even know their children anymore.
I think it's okay to feel a little disconnected from adult children, that shows that they are being independent and thinking for themselves, but feeling too disconnected isn't good.

Empty Nest Moms

Have you ever felt disconnected from your kids?
« on: June 01, 2018, 09:39:02 AM »

Offline girlchild34

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Re: Have you ever felt disconnected from your kids?
« Reply #1 on: June 01, 2018, 11:03:03 AM »
When the kids leave home to be on their own, they tend to feel some sort of independence and this may make parents feel disconnected. Though it has never reached that point, I know that it would be disturbing to feel that the kids were distant.

Offline Beth75

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Re: Have you ever felt disconnected from your kids?
« Reply #2 on: June 03, 2018, 02:52:52 AM »
Sadly, I understand the feeling completely. I love my children dearly and the times in which we have felt distant have always been hard for me. In my experience, just like with any other relationship in life, it wanes and waxes. I think this is a good sign though. Our children should feel comfortable enough to take their own space and go out into the world if they need it and so should we. It hurts sometimes when we are on the receiving end, but I always trust that they will be back and we will be closer again.

Empty Nest Moms

Re: Have you ever felt disconnected from your kids?
« Reply #2 on: June 03, 2018, 02:52:52 AM »

Offline Augi

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Re: Have you ever felt disconnected from your kids?
« Reply #3 on: June 03, 2018, 05:16:18 AM »
Our children should feel comfortable enough to take their own space and go out into the world if they need it and so should we.


I agree with this 100%. When I think back to certain relationships that I've had in my life, I regret not giving people their space without having a fit about it, and I really didn't like it when people seemed to not understand that my needing space was something that I needed to do for me as opposed to something that I was doing to them.
Being able to have your own space is very important in order to maintain a healthy state of mind, and our kids are entitled to that. Sometimes I have the urge to infringe where I'm clearly loved but clearly not wanted at that time, and I've just had to learn to go with the flow. Tend to my own life and let others lead theirs.

Offline Indiana

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Re: Have you ever felt disconnected from your kids?
« Reply #4 on: June 12, 2018, 01:08:53 PM »
I have felt that way before. She reached a certain age when she didn't want to talk to me nearly as much. This made me not know here nearly as well as I used to, and that led to the feeling of being disconnected.

Offline cookielady

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Re: Have you ever felt disconnected from your kids?
« Reply #5 on: June 12, 2018, 07:55:17 PM »
I am a little ashamed to admit this, but my daughter really was my best friend. When she went away to college, I consoled myself with the fact I'd have her all summer long and would get to spend lots of time with her then. But, now she's gone permanently-no more long visits, just brief holiday visits and I feel so disconnected from her. She's so busy now I'm lucky if she can skype every other week and I feel like everything I treasured is gone.

Empty Nest Moms

Re: Have you ever felt disconnected from your kids?
« Reply #5 on: June 12, 2018, 07:55:17 PM »

 

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