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Author Topic: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving  (Read 1508 times)

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Offline Serenity

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Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« on: November 16, 2017, 11:42:12 AM »
I recently met, fell in love with and moved in with a my boyfriend. Everything moved fast for us, but it felt right. While we are very happy he wants to spend the holidays with his ex and her family (his old family). On top of this, his ex has invited me to spend the holidays with them as well! I find the whole thing very odd.

I am trying my best to understand. This was his family for 15 years and the only real family he has. However, I feel spending Thanksgiving with them is a bit messed up. And to drag me along is insane! I have two choices...stay home and eat Thanksgiving dinner alone of go to the ex's house.

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Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« on: November 16, 2017, 11:42:12 AM »

Offline MaryB

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Re: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« Reply #1 on: November 16, 2017, 12:59:05 PM »
 :(   I am probably going to be the only downer here but GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!
How old are his children?  People may think that is good and healthy, but I dont.  He makes me angry and I am not you!  I want to pick you up and bring you to have dinner with us..   :dunno:
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Offline Serenity

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Re: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« Reply #2 on: November 16, 2017, 02:21:06 PM »
The even more messed up part...they have no kids!!! It will be the ex, her daughter from a prior marriage, son in law and their child (daughter & son in law)
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Re: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« Reply #2 on: November 16, 2017, 02:21:06 PM »

Offline MaryB

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Re: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« Reply #3 on: November 16, 2017, 02:31:12 PM »
 :017:   That's it!!!   Pack your bags I'm coming after you! 
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Offline amsmomm

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Re: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« Reply #4 on: November 18, 2017, 08:31:23 PM »
Wow, I thought my situation was messed up. I say, don't go. Tell him you are not going. If he chooses to go, I'd say take that time to pack your stuff. Your feelings count!
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Re: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« Reply #4 on: November 18, 2017, 08:31:23 PM »

Offline haidyl

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Re: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« Reply #5 on: December 20, 2017, 01:07:21 PM »
It would be really odd for all of you to be gathered at the same place. It isn't like he's forcing you to go, right? Now that Thanksgiving Day came and went, what did you decide upon?
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Offline Serenity

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Re: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« Reply #6 on: December 20, 2017, 02:36:32 PM »
I went and everything was fine. His ex was very welcoming and warm. I think it is all very odd to be honest, but I guess they just didn't look at it that way.

As an update, a month later...I really do not see this relationship working out in the long run. I have tried my best, given everything I have but sometimes people just want different things in life. It breaks my heart but better to find out now then years down the road.

Thank you to everyone who took time to listen and gave such wonderful advice!
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Offline Elizabeth

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Re: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« Reply #7 on: December 23, 2017, 04:19:13 PM »
Hi Serenity....glad things went ok at the Thanksgiving dinner but sorry to hear that you don't think the relationship will work out in the long run. But, as you said, better now then later. Most would just 'settle' and try to go forward to see how it goes. Sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders. Hope you have a nice Christmas and do stay in touch with us here if you can!
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Offline MaryB

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Re: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« Reply #8 on: December 23, 2017, 04:25:44 PM »
Splitting is always hard, no matter what, but around the holidays they hurt worse.    Big hugs to you dear friend...   big hugs   :big hug smiley sign:
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Empty Nest Moms

Re: Very Messed Up Thanksgiving
« Reply #8 on: December 23, 2017, 04:25:44 PM »
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