Going out alone.

[Micky]

With my friends all busy and my DH away I'm feeling really trapped and alone, but I'm wondering if I should go on trips on my own or stay close to the phone in case the children call or I am needed. I feel really selfish going out to places on my own, but then everyone else seems to be doing their thing and I don't have anything.

[MaryB]

I just am concerned that staying in, alone, is not healthy for you!  When I lived in a place where there were no neighbors close,  I had a friend (long distance) that would push me to go to the shopping mall.  Every time I did,  I would just walk on the outside of the stores (going in the shoe store or Hallmark) and every time would run into a friendly person that talked and lightened my loneliness.   I wish you luck with this dear friend.   

[Lyndish]

It isn't selfish to go out on your own. If everyone else is doing their own thing, why shouldn't you? A friendly face or just chatting to someone at the shops really helps me feel better when I am down.

If you're worried that the children might call, do you have a mobile phone? If they can reach you anywhere if they need to, then you don't need to worry about missing calls.

[Tamlyn]

The very worst thing that you can do for yourself and anyone around you that you love and care about is to neglect yourself and your needs. You can't give to anyone else when you haven't given to yourself first. Your health and wellbeing come first, and you will find that the more you take care of yourself the more you will be able to become a better parent to your children. Take the time to go out and enjoy yourself and don't ever feel guilty about it.

[SpotOn]

With my friends all busy and my DH away I'm feeling really trapped and alone, but I'm wondering if I should go on trips on my own or stay close to the phone in case the children call or I am needed. I feel really selfish going out to places on my own, but then everyone else seems to be doing their thing and I don't have anything.

By all means, get out and about, you deserve it! The kids, or kids, I don't know what DH means, are doing his or her, or their own things and living his or her, or their own lives, why not you? Life is too short to waste by the phone and fret about "what's next?" Just do yourself a favor, relax and enjoy going different places, if the young one or ones need you, believe me, he, she or they will be in touch.

[Micky]

Thank you for all your advice. I'm going to try having a look at some of the sights near here and see how it works out. Shutting myself away for retirement seems such a waste.

[Kirsten]

That's a great idea. No one benefits from your looking yourself up and hiding away from society. I applaud your decision to get back out there and live your best life.

[Jessalyn]

Go out and treat yourself to a delicious dinner Micky! Go see a movie or play or even get a luxurious massage. I am sure you stay really busy taking care of everyone else most of the time, it is time to take care of yourself.

[Kirsten]

This just gave me an idea for a little game that anyone can play and that will help you in times like these when you don't know what to do with yourself. Keep a notepad handy where you can write down things that make you happy when you do them. Keep adding to the list until you have hundreds and when you don't know what to do just read through your list and I guarantee you will be motivated to do something - whether it's going out, watching a movie, singing along to some of your favorite music or soaking in the tub.